On systems, schedules and eternal messes

I have a housekeeping schedule. Its a little loose, and looks something like this:

Monday: Major Pick-up, Bathrooms

Tuesday: Groceries & Errands

Wednesday: Laundry (clothes), Vacuum downstairs, Garbage

Thursday: Dust, Pick a room and clean thouroughly

Friday: Kitchen Floors, Counters, Stove

Saturday: Laundry (non-clothes), Vacuum upstairs & downstairs

Every evening I sweep the kitchen floor (it is desperate for it, EVERY evening) and Brian does the dishes (I don't do dishes. I delegated that to him 6 years ago and he has, lovingly, stuck to it for 6 years).

Confession: I do not follow this schedule. I manage the groceries and errands on Tuesday, I manage the laundry on Wednesday and Saturday. I manage to sweep the floor every evening and nag Brian (when necessary) into doing the dishes. But the rest... I just can't bring myself to do it.

Maybe its just an excuse, but it just feels so darned fultile to try picking up or (heaven forbid) cleaning a room while I have two little people literally following me a round and un-doing everything I try to do. If I try to pick up the kid's DVDs and put them back in their storage bins, Carter will help by removing them, one-by-one, as soon as I've got them in. Same goes for the books on the bookshelf, and the toys in the bins in the family room.

Allison is super-helpful in that the second she's done with something, not matter what it is, she throws it on the floor. It doesn't seem to matter how many times I've told her not to do it, she still does.

I've been reading lots of house-keeping system books lately, trying to get a handle on my house... so that I don't feel like its always a mess. The most recent one suggests that your schedule includes an errand day, a "quiet" chore day (pay bill, balance the check book, make grocery lists and menu plans... that sort of thing), a moderate cleaning day (2-4 hours of cleaning), a heavy cleaning day (4-6 hours) and one free day, where you only do things you want to do.

Really? I only get to do things that I actually WANT to do one day a week? And further more, what am I supposed to do with my kids while I'm busy doing whatever I want? Becuase I can tell you that 1) I don't want my children getting their hands on the things I want to do for me and 2) what I want to spend my day doing and whay my kids want me to spend my day doing are two VASTLY different thing.

And what about those cleaning days? Seriously? How am I supposed to accomplish 2 or more hours or real, actual cleaning when I've got these kids following me around, asking for constant attention, fighting with eachother and whining about being bored, or hungry, or tired. Just exactly when am I supposed to accomplish that? Naptime... doesn't exactly last that long anymore. And I typically use naptime to "treat" myself to a nice, healthy lunch that doesn't consist of food leftover from my kids' lunch plates (and, furthermore, since when was a real meal a treat? At what point in my life did proper nutrition morph from need to privilege?).

So if naptime's out, and I don't want my effort undone immediatly after accomplishing it, so while kids are awake is out. I guess that leaves after the kids bedtime... so I need to spend 2 nights a week cleaning, starting around 7 and ending anywhere between 9 pm and 1 am. Wow. Sounds like exactly how I want to spend my evenings. That was my sarcastic voice, for those who didn't catch it.

Yes, I'm frustrated. Yes, I'm whining. Yes, at this point I'd think I'd prefer to just throw everything we own away so that I don't have to deal with it. But seriously, is there a system that works when you're kids aren't in school? Is there one that doesn't involve spending every spare moment I have without the kids picking up, or cleaning in the endlessly futile battle against the mess? Or is it hopeless? Should I just give up until they're all in school?

Frustration Revisited

I went home this weekend. One of my best friend's from high school, Chrissy, got married. It was an absolutely beautiful wedding. If you recall, I was frustrated over my apparent inablility to finish making a dress I started a few years ago so I could wear it to this wedding.

Well, I took the dress home at my mom's request. The thought was that we could work on it and get it finished before the wedding. Apparently my mom lapsed on the fact that I have a 1 year old... needless to say we didn't even touch the dress. I did, however, leave it at my mom's hoping that she can finish it and make it look as nice as it does in my head. I wore a cute little number that my little sister had made a few weeks eariler (which made me jealous and slightly more frustrated).

So... here's my game plan. I'm going back to square one. Several years ago I made a cute black jumper that I really like. It no longer fits super well in the bodice, so I think I'll get some fabric and make another one of those jumper. A tried-and-true pattern working out could help me get my bearings and confidence back. Then I'll probably work on some small projects and garments for Allison. I have fabric and a pattern for a cute little dress for her. My mom also told me to try Burda patterns (apparently they tend to be more true to measurement than McCalls/Vogue/Simplicity/Butterick), and to try my hand at flat pattern measurements, to make sure I'm not being lied to. I'm also thinking that if I want to make nice things for myself, I need to take the time to do a fitting muslin. Hopefully, when I'm ready to get back on the horse, all this will help me get the results I want.

Frustration...

A little background info. I sew. I've been sewing since I was 10. I remember wearing an outfit that I had made all by myself (well, as "all by myself" that a 10 year old learner gets) to the first day of 5th grade. That was 15 years ago. I sewed a lot during high school. And I didn't just sew. I was pretty good. I made 5 prom dresses and, not to toot my own horn or anything, they were beautiful. I was an excellent seamstress.

Today, however, I came to the sad realization that I know find sewing far more frustrating than fulfilling. I can't remember the last time I finished a project of any significance. The last article of clothing that I made for myself was a cute black jumper. That was almost 4 years ago, and it is the last sewing project that I have been happy with.

What brought this all up? Well, if you look at my project list you'll see "My Graduation Dress" listed there. This "graduation dress" is a dress I started for my college graduation in April 2006. This is the pattern I was using.

I've been working on the one shown in the bottom right corner (plus sleeves of course). The twisted bodice is adorable and it has a high waist and A-line skirt. I'm making it out of this beautiful maroon and gold silky, border print fabric. It looks a little like sari fabric.

When I started the project I carefully took my body measurements and cut the fabric out using the pattern siz that matched my measurements. Lo and behold, the day before my graduation I have the bodice done and the skirt ready to sew on and finish. I try the bodice on for fit and it doesn't. It super doesn't fit. Its about 4 inches too big all around (despite the fact that measured so carefully and cut out the "correct" size). I don't have the time to finish it before graduation, so I choose something else to wear and set it aside for later.

Fast forward to today. One of my best friends from high school is getting married in 2 weeks and I think that dress would be nice to wear to her wedding. It is sitting in my project drawer in the exact same state it was left more than 2 years ago. I had Brian help me take the extra width out of the side seams and I try to get going on this dress again. I manage to get the bodice properly fit and now I have to get the skirt top to match the bodice. I work on it and get the skirt put on only to try it out and discover that the skirt hangs weird at the side seams. It folds over itself and doesn't drape nicely. I take it apart, change the line of the offending seams and try again. One side is looking better, but the other side just looks strange.

Then, looking in the mirror, I decide that not only does it look weird, but it makes me look fat. And it will probably never look as nice actually made as it looks in my head. The only way I can thing to fix the problem is to take the dress apart again. Everytime I take a seam out, I damage the delicate woven fabric. So now I'm frustrated. I can't figure out how to fix the problem without ruining my project.

I used to like sewing... I used to be good at sewing. But now... all I ever have to show for my efforts is a drawer full of half-finished projects that I don't feel like I have time for. And its frustrating...